FOR THE FUTURE...

OK THIS POST IS FOR ME TO READ ONE MONTH FROM NOW AND TRY TO UNDERSTAND WHAT I WAS GOIN THROUGH DURING A LEVELS.....

hello PARMES!

how are you doin? well alevels have ended. yipee! so how did it go? did u nail tll ell and gp?? cos from where i'm standing HISTORY LOOKS LIKE A GONER.... but hey look on the bright side and u can now focus on the stuff you relly wanted to do.

i just want you to know that u were so psychotic during the a level period that you actually logged on to blogspot and wrote yourself a post from the past at freaking 4AM after doin 3 application questions....

FACE IT PARMES WHAT YOUR FRIENDS THOUGHT ABOUT IS TRUE.

YOU ARE AN NUT-CASE!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME...

A big THANK YOU TO THESE DARLINGS FOR MAKING MY 19TH BIRTHDAY A BLAST!

that's how excited i was.... and that's a RASPBERRY CHEESECAKE FROM BAKERZIN!

it disappered very very fast!

SECOND CAKE! FROM CHOCZ FROM NITTY KOOT KOOTS!

YOU MADE MY WEEK!

A VERY HAPPY CHILD!

tats my gal!

jus so u noe... u rocked my bday!!

well.. with that the official blog post starts....

the whole week has been a horrible and horrendous one.

wasn't really looking forward to my birthday but that all changed.

nitty koot koos called me down to 'pass me some stuff' wasn't really expecting anything other than a card but lo behold right there in the middle of J8 i got a small bday cake with a barney balloon in my hand and of cos a beautifully written card...

i was seriously taken aback by her sincerity. i mean i knew that she meant every single word that she had wrote in that card.. lols then i was treated to a delicious meal at coffee bean and we both sat there and talked for eons! sharing with her about my week gave me the oportunity to just breathe and relax. at that moment it was nice to know that i always had a shoulder to lean on.... so many thoughts rushed through my mind but i felt happy for the first time after weeks... i always knew i was never the quantity in friends person... i needed only one to be truly happy....

then came the MAYHEM at pizza hut.... NERRISSA THEODORA HAZIYAH NATASHA GOBI!

the food was superbly good and i was there enjoying my flirting session with theo baby... all of sudden i hear HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU over the freaking stereo! everyone at pizza hut were lokin for the birthday gal...at that point i was praying that it was someone else's bday... i didn't want any attention on me... my disgusting eye bags have stopped me from wanting to interact with human beings... but oh no! the sly grin on all the devils faces revealed to me that the beautiful cake was for me and there were like candles all over them. hahaha i was happy to make my wish and cut it! TWO FREAKING CAKES IN ONE DAY! lol best BDAY EVER!

after filling our tmmies we all left .... i had this smile on my face... this gooey gooey feeling all around me. i was in a purple bubble flying high! lol after a looooong time i was happy that it was my birthday!

andthen of cos there was the case of returning home... and of cos all hell broke loose again.. ahhhh i suppose all good things must come to an end...

but ben ben love you for the beautiful gesture... love you for being there! and of cos i'll cya tmrw... ESPLANADE HERE WE COME!!!

I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday..... nineteen years have been a long one for me. to say that i have learnt alot would be an understatement. there are a few more hurdles ahead, some more obvious than the others, all i ask for is the courage to face them.

THE SHOW MUST GO ON....

Empty spaces - what are we living for

Abandoned places - I guess we know the score

On and on, does anybody know what we are looking for...

Another hero, another mindless crime

Behind the curtain, in the pantomime

Hold the line, does anybody want to take it anymore

The show must go on,

The show must go on

Inside my heart is breaking

My make-up may be flaking

But my smile still stays on.

Whatever happens, Ill leave it all to chance

Another heartache, another failed romance

On and on, does anybody know what we are living for?

I guess Im learning, I must be warmer now

Ill soon be turning, round the corner now

Outside the dawn is breaking

But inside in the dark Im aching to be free

The show must go on

The show must go on

Inside my heart is breaking

My make-up may be flaking

But my smile still stays on

My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies

Fairytales of yesterday will grow but never die

I can fly - my friends

The show must go on

The show must go on

Ill face it with a grin

Im never giving in

On - with the show -

Ill top the bill, Ill overkill

I have to find the will to carry on

On with the -

On with the show -

The show must go on...

FESTIVE SEASON...

i really really hate the festive season other than the food of course...

i'm jus gonna rant here....

I HATE DEEPAVALI!

it's true... y? well duh it's time for family to get together... ahhhhh

i don't ever remember having a good memory about stoopid deepavali... the day is filled with fights and COLD WAR over the dinner table.. sigh the whole thing is jus a stupid charade that my entire family puts up! screw everybody! i think i wanna stop celebrating this stupid thing!

every year deepavali comes and goes and everyone celebrates it. i really like the way it's celebrated in the villages of india... the whole village gets together and although everyone is so freaking poor they have genuine happiness on their faces and the smiles are so radiant!

but here! urghhh! HUMANS DISGUST ME AT TIMES... all decked out in freaking gold and diamonds and designer suits from bombay and bangalore but their hearts as cold and black as a coal mine!

THIS SHALL THE THEME SONG FOR EVERY FREAKING GOD DAMN IT DEEPAVALI!

FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU VERY VERY MUCH

CAUSE WE HATE WHAT YOU DO

AND WE HATE YOUR WHOLE CREW

SOOOOOOOOO

PLEASE DON'T STAY IN TOUCH!!!!!!!!

ahhh.... other than the hatred that i have harboured for deepavali since the age of 4, i just can't seem to like anything at this point of time. the days are just moving in a snail like pace and i hate everything and everyone in it... for some unknown reason

I'M BEING PUSHED ONTO A EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER RIDE

ps: I MISS YOU PATTI... why did u go?

reminscing...

I AM THE WORLD BIGGEST PROCASTINATOR!!

acceptance leads to change .....

i've been procrastinating like crazy. one would think with the exams jus a matter of days away i would be deep in revision..but all i've managed to do is read my notes... my plans of writing out gazillion essays have gone down the drain....

i hate it when ppl go like 'AREN'T U SUPPOSED TO BE STUDYING??' are u freaking dumb of cos i know that.....

atleast my time tabling has worked. thanks ben ben for the great idea. managed to get a time table out and i must say that i'm kinda sticking to it... after completing my work on sat i decided to go for aarthi's bday party. it was a great idea.. 4 hours well -spent wif my babies deepa, chittra and aarthi. of cos some harmless drinking lols

got home and actually wrote a decent essay!! should be proud of myself :)

although i'm technically no more a jc student i so badly want to be one again. i really really REALLY REALLY miss yj.... like syarul said the only thing that can be now is to make the school proud by doin well... slight adjustment to that is to make the teachers proud by doin well.

i miss my darling teachers in particular goddess, BEYONCE, gorgeous and mrs low... all of them were so sentimental on friday.

speaking of friday,

had the most embarrassing moment of my life in yj on the last day of sch!!! TSL decided to be nice for once and give out sweets to those who volunteered their answers. as i was kinda reluctant to go for consultation with her i decided to read out my intro which earned me a sweet. well i asked for the sweet from US and got a freaking lollipop and if she had jus passed it to me everything would have been fine but noooo she had to freaking throw it and of cos it flew into my shirt... there embarrassed laughter resonated the walls of the audi!! lols... it was kinda of a bang to end the last day of sch...

and ell tutorial with wallace ended with a bang with us cam whoring with him!!! lol I'M GONNA MISS MY SANTA CLAUS!!

THE MAN!! was he most emotional on fri... he blessed us all to get A'S lol and he was sooo touched with the photo frame that was pesented to him!! though i never imagined i will say this.. i'll miss him and will always always have extremely fond memories of him!! HE'S ONE MAN WITH CHARSIMA YA'LL!! IF ONLY ALL INDIAN MEN WERE MORE LIKE HIM(with more hair on the head of cos)

as for graduation day,

CTG 225 WAS THE BEST CLASS!!

we embarrassed dear GORGEOUS who unfortunately was made the MC. she was literally victimised by my entire class!! but she enjoyed the attention that was showered onto her and said so in the sms she sent while hiding backstage. WE LOVE YOU GORGEOUS!! ( looking forward to dec 6/7...!!!!)

although the idea of 'SALAMING' the ct's hand was kinda last minute, it turned out to be a hit. and our ct could not stop giggling away and that stopped her from saying anything meaningful to us... oh and HAZIYAH WAS BOOOOOOOOMZ!! the moment she walked onto stage everyone went 'HELLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO' her trademark sound!! lol then she nearly killed / pushed syraul in her attempt to be in the center of the clas photo lol.

then the scottish song weirdly bonded the class. all of stood together , held hands and hips to dance the tunes of an unknown scottish song (which according to ikan bilis should be sung only on new year's day). the sch song took a new meaning and a new tone!! with haziyah by my side both of us embarked on a singing sch song remixed with opera! with that the official graduation ceremony was over.. but then started the INFORMAL ONE!!

MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR photoshoot with NANANANNANANA, BEYONCE AND GORGEOUS at the fish pond!! really gotta thank lohan head for the great polaroid shots!! and of cos after that endless stream of hugging ensued.... LOVE U GUYS!! and then another small photoshoot with darling low!!

with that off to NORTHPOINT with ikan bilis, botox, koot koots, SEXAY, chanel and G.O.B.I . gorged on briyani like a pig and laughed with the company till tears came streaming down and almost peed on my skirt.... ALMOST... lols

then a long bus ride with koot koots and a short talk with her at my fave spot in the park!!

with that ended my beauiful day.


ps: shal lpast the pics once i get my hand on them...

GRADUATION

THIS POST IS KINDA DEDICATED TO THIS PIG...

the idiots of yj

i really miss this idiots....

THE INDIANS!!

MY sista!!!


I WANTED SOOO BADLY TO BE IN THIS CLASS




THE CRAZY CLASS I ENDED UP IN !!!!

THE IDIOTS WHO MADE YJ BEARABLE!!!!

it would be an understatement to say that 3 yrs have flown by....

i still remember walkingto sch with a 3/4 jeans and a stupid green shirt ... i was happy ...

happy in the sense that mugging for 2 weeks for 0 levels actually works and tat i could enter a jc!!

and then came my first class... walked in and saw more than half the class filled with SCAAAARY cult like indians... and then lo behold found out that the indain community in yj is super uber large!!! and made a mental note never to get acquainted with them... (hahahaha IRONIC)

of cos my first friends in yj were rio and wari... on the first day wen we met each other we jus stuck together.. on the second day wari sat on my lap...lol if i had only known then how much i'll grow to love her in the years to come...

they say in a true frindship u can't really remember the first time u meet.... but i beg to differ... those days are etched in my mind. forone who has really really bad memory i can safely say that i treasured those memories and thus remembered them....

well... i can't talk abt yj without talking abt wari and thus i shall continue on to talk a bit more abt her...

where shall i start??

1) i found her red nose super weird ( and kinda cute never really told her that and now i really miss it)

2) her sarcasm andsnide remarks ( always had me rolling arnd in laughter... lol ONCE A BITCH ALWAYS A BITCH!!!)

3) PW revealed that both of us will fight till the end to realise our dreams...


that was us two very strong women who knew what they wanted out of their life... to a very large extent more than the crazy times we had.. it was the rare moments where our confidence and stubbborn-headedness materialised that we grew closer... we could have a very very heated debate on animal rights and then sit back and share a choc sundae ( financial reasons... :) ) the arguments never made us wanna separate... we wanted to fight more!!! lol and found the exchange of ideas refreshing....

then came terry fox run in sentosa (PW project) the place we found out that both of loved dancing the SAMBA!! running a 4.2 KM run can do wonder's for one's friendship hahaha....

and then of cos the parties , endless lessons, testsand lectures bonded us but me being me thought that it may end after jc life ended... but wari changed that thought with her actions (ok she may kill me for bloggin this but i want to lol)

on the day i got retained and rocky got kicked out... i saw another side of her... in the seminar room with two of us surrounding her she cried.... i had known her for a year and in certain ways she was very very diff from me... i cried to cope with everything and move on but she has very very low eq... she was very much emotionally detached... but those tears revealed to me taht deep concern and love that she had for her 2 closest friends... i was moved... i accepted the fact that i had retained but i cried cos i was moved by her and her love....

those are the things tat i remember most abt yjc...my first yr was sooooooooooo worth everything. i'm not gonna list everybody down cos then this post is goin to be way tooo long but all i gotta say is thanks guys!!

the next two years flew by with ease... this two yrs have expanded my horizons and taught me alot abt my personal life and society.... once again have loads of ppl to remeber but i shall i meet them personally after my a's and give them the tightest hug they've ever had... :)

JC will always be the place where i experienced a myriad of feelings and had many ups and downs... but JC also taucght me that no matter how shitty life gets there is one thing makes it all OK...

FRIENDSHIP

SEC SCH KIDS...

my fave lines from my bro's conversation with his friend the NIGHT BEFORE HIS HISTORY EXAM:

1)dei u got file history notes or not?

2) hitler COMMUNIST wat.... (frantically flips his file)

3) trade union ah dei?? wait ah... (flips book.. scratches head) dei wat's that da....

4)so (hitler burn the building) then become PRESIDENT rite? ( hmmm... ever heard of a word call 'FHURER'??)

5) so i summarise ah dei...hitler kill many many jew using other men... (WOW THE HOLOCAUST IN 8 WORDS PPL!!!!)

6) dei we go chapter by chapter la... now finish chap 1 so next chap 2 now (at 12 midnight!!!)

7) france where ah dei?? near AMERICA ah????? ( i nearly dropped of my seat for this one)

with that thankfully my bro put the phone down....

I SHALL PRAY FOR MY BROTHER!!!